Foreword
In today’s offering, Brian shares a nurturing take on masculinity - one that builds safe, sustaining community. I have learned so much from him about how to do this with integrity and grace. I’m so grateful for all the men in the world who bring this to bear in their lives and orbits. Its effect has far-reaching ripples.
-Katie Shaw Thompson
I’m not the kind of man who needs to own the room.
I’m the kind who built it.
Not for control, not for applause—
But so others could feel safe inside it.
I’ve seen the kind of masculinity that postures instead of protects.
Loud. Fragile.
Full of bluster, but hollow at its core.
It shouts over tenderness, mocks vulnerability, and calls that strength.
But I know better.
I’ve been broken.
I’ve been lost.
I’ve failed, fallen, and stood back up.
Not harder—wiser.
Not colder—warmer.
Not alone—but with others.
I carry my scars like maps,
not to show where I’ve been hurt—
but how I found my way back.
I am not afraid to feel.
I am not afraid to grieve.
I’ve wept without shame.
I’ve held hands in silence.
I’ve stood at the edges of joy and pain and let both move through me.
Because the kind of man I am
knows that softness is not surrender—
it’s precision.
It’s power, honed by care.
It’s the strength to stay
when it would be easier to run.
I’ve led in rooms I wasn’t expected to be in.
I’ve held doors open that others would rather slam shut.
I’ve built tables, not pedestals.
And when the fire burned low,
I stayed to feed it.
I’m not building a brand.
I’m building a life.
One where love is a practice, not a performance.
Where community isn’t a photo op—it’s the center of everything.
A partner.
A neighbor.
I’m a father figure to many.
A warlock to her witch.
A man who believes in the spell of a shared life
lit by laughter, rooted in truth,
and forged in everyday acts of grace.
My masculinity doesn’t need defending—
because it doesn’t threaten anyone.
It holds.
It listens.
It builds.
And when the world turns cold,
it keeps the hearth warm
for anyone who needs it.
That’s the kind of man I am.
And I’m not done becoming.
